Why Not Gift a Handkerchief or Scarf to Your Lover? Is It Really That Bad?

Giving gifts to your lover is always one of the ways to express sincere affection and care. One commonly mentioned gift is the handkerchief or scarf.

It is believed that gifting a handkerchief or scarf can lead to a breakup. This is a common belief in some places; however, it is not always true and can vary according to different cultures and personal perspectives.

So, should you gift a handkerchief or scarf to your lover? This article by Chus will help you understand more about the meaning of gifting a handkerchief or scarf and whether it is a good idea.

A gift scarf

Why is a Handkerchief or Scarf Considered a Taboo Gift for Lovers?

There are several reasons why people avoid gifting a handkerchief or scarf to their lover. Let's explore these reasons:

1. Symbol of Separation:

In both Eastern and Western cultures, handkerchiefs or scarves were often given as keepsakes before going to war, symbolizing warmth and companionship.

However, since many soldiers did not return, these items became seen as unlucky, causing separation in love. Thus, gifting a handkerchief or scarf might be interpreted as wanting to end the relationship.

Waving handkerchief goodbye (Image: Getty Images)

2. Associated with Dirt:

Handkerchiefs or scarves retain things considered “unclean” such as stains and sweat. Many people believe that gifting such items may make the recipient feel uncomfortable and think that you wish to bring negativity into their life.

3. Symbol of Surrender:

When people lose a battle, a white flag is often used. 

That image looks like a cloth or white handkerchief, to signal surrender. Therefore, in many cultures, gifting a handkerchief or scarf can be seen as bringing bad luck, similar to the symbol of defeat and surrender, creating unwanted negativity in the relationship.

4. KUsed in Funerals:

Handkerchiefs are often used in funerals. Therefore, gifting a handkerchief can remind the recipient of death and the sadness associated with funerals, causing discomfort and a sense of bad luck.

5. KWiping Away Tears:

Handkerchiefs are often used to wipe away tears, symbolizing sorrow and separation. Gifting a handkerchief can make the recipient think of tears and feelings of sadness, which is not suitable for celebratory events or happy occasions, making the gift seem less positive.

What Does Gifting a Handkerchief or Scarf Mean?

Despite the taboos in some cultures, gifting a handkerchief or scarf is not necessarily bad and can be very practical and fashionable. Therefore, they are still good gift options with many positive meanings. Some of these include:

1. Bringing Warmth:

A handkerchief or scarf is a frequently used item, especially in cold weather, making it a gift that conveys care, warmth, and the desire for your lover to always feel safe and warm.

Scarf or shawl brings warmth

2. A Memorable Gift:

A handkerchief or scarf is not only practical but also holds deep sentimental value. Each time your lover uses it, they will think of you and feel the love you have for them. It is an invisible connection, reminding them of your care and affection.

The gift of warmth can strengthen love of couples

3. Promise and Commitment:

In some contexts, a handkerchief or scarf can be gifted as a promise, symbolizing commitment and loyalty. This is often seen in long-term relationships, showing the enduring bond between lovers.

Why You Should Gift a Handkerchief or Scarf to Your Lover

1. Practicality:

A handkerchief or scarf is a very practical gift. Whether it’s a fashionable scarf, a handkerchief, or a towel, they all have everyday uses. This ensures your gift won't be forgotten or wasted but will become a part of your lover’s daily life.

2. Variety of Choices:

Handkerchiefs and scarves come in various designs, colors, and materials, easily customizable to match your lover’s style and fashion preferences. You can choose a soft silk scarf for someone who loves elegance, or a simple linen scarf for someone who prefers comfort and simplicity.

Scarves, shawls or kerchiefs may come in many colors, designs and materials

3. Emotional Significance:

As mentioned, handkerchiefs and scarves carry a lot of emotional meaning. By gifting one, you show your care and desire to protect your lover from life's challenges. It is a subtle and meaningful way to express your love.

Types of Cloths Often Gifted

Scarf

A scarf is an ideal gift to keep your lover warm, especially in winter. With many designs, materials, and colors, scarves not only keep you warm but also serve as a fashion accessory to help your lover stand out.

Hand-weaving silk to turn them into silk scarves - Thổ Cẩm PIÊU | CHUS

Embroidered Handkerchief:

Embroidered handkerchiefs bring sophistication and uniqueness, making them perfect for showing your meticulous care. They are not only visually appealing but also contain deep meanings, with special patterns or even the name of your lover to make the gift truly one-of-a-kind.

Pink linen handkerchief with hand embroidery - Bông Bay Bay | CHUS

Choose the Right Handkerchief or Scarf:

1. Choose the Right Handkerchief or Scarf:

To gift effectively, you need to choose the right handkerchief or scarf that matches your lover’s style and preferences. Pay attention to the material, color, and design to ensure it will be well-received and frequently used.

2. Combine with Other Gifts:

If you are concerned that a handkerchief or scarf alone may not be significant enough, combine it with other gifts. A warm scarf with a handwritten card or a box of chocolates can create a perfect and heartfelt gift.

Silk face towel and silk scrunchie gift set for her - ÓNG heartmadeinvietnam | CHUS

3. Choose the Right Occasion:

The timing of the gift is also important. Handkerchiefs or scarves are suitable for gifting in winter or on special occasions like birthdays, Valentine's Day, or anniversaries. Choosing the right occasion enhances the value and meaning of the gift.

Conclusion

Gifting a handkerchief or scarf to your lover can be a very thoughtful and meaningful way to express your affection. With practical benefits, customizable options, and emotional significance, these items make wonderful gifts. However, you should also consider traditional beliefs and your lover’s personal preferences to ensure your gift is warmly received.

Chus hopes this article has provided you with a comprehensive view on whether to gift a handkerchief or scarf to your lover and how to do so properly. We wish you find the perfect and meaningful gift to express your love and care.

Don't forget that you can find a variety of quality, handcrafted handkerchiefs and scarves made from materials like silk and linen, with unique designs from local brands rich in Vietnamese culture.