- Jun 22, 2025
Is Giving Money as a Birthday Gift Okay? Simple Guide for Every Person
Research from Tilburg University reveals that people typically view money gifts as less thoughtful than traditional presents of equal value. However, this perception completely shifts when money is given with cultural meaning and proper presentation, as seen in Vietnamese lì xì traditions. The key isn't the amount you give, but how thoughtfully you present it and whether you understand the recipient's cultural background.
Discover the exact amounts, presentation techniques, and cultural guidelines that transform simple cash into meaningful birthday gifts.
Why Do People Give Gifts?
1. Everyone gives gifts
Research published in the Journal of Consumer Research have found that people in every country around the world give gifts. It's not just about giving someone something. Gifts help us build friendships and show we care about people.
A researcher from Stanford University says that giving gifts shows "we want to be fair" and "we respect the other person." Simple translation: gifts show we care.
Thoughtful gift presentation shows care and respect - a universal tradition across all cultures.
2. What science says about money gifts
Researchers at Yale University found something interesting. People who give gifts usually want to give pretty or fancy things. But people who get gifts often want useful, practical stuff. That's why giving money can feel weird sometimes. The person giving thinks "this is boring," but the person getting it thinks "this is exactly what I need!"
Real example:
Sarah's college nephew asked his family for money to buy a laptop instead of random gifts. Some relatives felt weird about giving "just money," but he was super happy because he could finally buy the computer he needed for his design classes.
When Is Money a Good Gift?
1. Close family who are going through big changes
Money is a great gift when family members are dealing with big life stuff—college students, people getting married and saving for a house, or relatives who need financial help.
How to give it nicely:
- Present it with fresh, new bills in a nice package.
- Write a warm, personal card explaining your thoughtful decision.
- Be specific: "For your college fund" or "For your first apartment"
2. Kids and Teenagers
Studies show that kids and teens actually prefer getting money. Why? Because it gives them freedom and teaches them about money.
What a 2023 survey found: 78% of teenagers liked money gifts more than gifts adults picked for them because they could:
- Save for things they actually wanted
- Learn how to budget and compare prices
- Feel trusted to make their own choices
- Buy trending stuff adults might not know about
How to give money by age:
- Ages 8-12: Put money in fun envelopes with ideas about saving or spending
- Ages 13-17: Give them nice presentation and trust their choices
- College age: Understand they have real money needs and responsibilities
3. Cultural traditions make money special
In many cultures, money gifts transcend their monetary value, becoming profound expressions of tradition and blessing. Understanding these customs transforms a simple offering into a meaningful gesture.
For instance, in Vietnam, the tradition of giving lì xì (lucky money in red envelopes) during Tết vividly illustrates how these gifts embody rich cultural significance beyond their numerical worth.
Traditional Vietnamese lì xì (lucky money) exchange during Tết demonstrates how cultural presentation transforms simple money into meaningful blessings. Photo by Bach Nguyen on Unsplash
Vietnamese Lucky Number Meanings:
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Number 8: Sounds like "phát" (prosperity/wealth) - Popular amounts: 88,000, 188,000, 888,000 VND
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Number 6: Represents smooth life and business success
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Number 9: Symbolizes longevity and lasting happiness
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Even numbers: Better than odd numbers (represent completeness and balance)
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Avoid number 4: Sounds like "death" in Vietnamese
Traditional Vietnamese Gift Amounts:
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Children: 20,000 - 100,000 VND
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Close relationships: 200,000 - 500,000 VND ($8-20)
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Lucky combinations: 200,000, 500,000, 666,000, 999,000, or 1,888,000 VND
Vietnamese Gift Etiquette:
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Give money in clean, new bills (old money seems disrespectful)
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Use red envelopes or beautiful cards
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Receiver accepts with both hands and says thank you
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Never open the envelope in front of the giver
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The blessing matters more than the amount
When You Should NOT Give Money
1. Romantic relationships
Research suggests that money as a gift in romantic relationships can feel more like a business transaction than an expression of love. Instead, personal, thoughtful gifts are usually more effective for boyfriends, girlfriends, or spouses.
The reason is simple:
When you're in love, you want your partner to show they truly know you. A carefully chosen gift communicates, "I pay attention to what makes you happy." Money, even a substantial amount, can unintentionally send the message, "I didn't have time to consider what you'd genuinely want." Romantic partners typically prefer gifts that create shared memories or demonstrate a personal understanding of their interests and dreams.
In romantic relationships, thoughtful gifts that show personal care and attention create stronger emotional connections than monetary presents.
2. Colleagues
When it comes to the workplace, non-monetary gifts are generally more effective and appropriate. They foster genuine friendships and connections rather than making interactions feel like mere business transactions.
The professional environment is already steeped in financial exchanges, salaries, and contractual agreements. Introducing monetary gifts can blur the crucial line between personal friendships and professional relationships. Instead, small, thoughtful gifts are more impactful because they demonstrate that you value your colleague as an individual, not just a coworker.
Workplace birthday celebrations with thoughtful gifts like cake and small presents help build genuine friendships among colleagues.
Consider items such as their favorite snacks, a high-quality coffee mug, or something related to their hobbies. These types of gifts convey a personal touch, signaling, "I pay attention to your preferences," rather than simply, "here's some cash." Furthermore, many workplaces have strict policies regarding monetary gifts, which could lead to awkward situations or even disciplinary action.
How Much Money Should You Give?
The amount depends on two things: your relationship with the person and how much you can afford. Research shows that being thoughtful matters more than the exact amount.
Simple guidelines:
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Close family: 1,800,000 - 3,600,000+ VND ($75-150+)
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Extended family: 750,000 - 1,800,000 VND ($30-75)
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Close friends: 600,000 - 1,200,000 VND ($25-50)
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Acquaintances: 360,000 - 600,000 VND ($15-25)
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Children: 500,000 - 1,200,000 VND ($20-50)
How to Make Money Gifts More Thoughtful
1. What science says about presentation
Tilburg University research made an important discovery: When people received money in special gift cards or envelopes, they reported feeling much happier and more grateful compared to receiving plain cash.
This phenomenon occurs because our brains process packaged money differently than loose bills. When money is presented in a beautiful envelope or a special card, it feels more like a "real gift" and less like a mere payment or transaction.
Beautiful presentation transforms ordinary money into thoughtful gifts.
The packaging itself demonstrates extra effort and thoughtfulness. It transforms ordinary money into something that feels more personal and caring. Consider the difference: receiving 500,000 VND in a crumpled envelope feels vastly different from getting the same amount in a beautifully decorated red envelope with your name inscribed on it. While the monetary value is identical, the emotional impact is profoundly different.
The research conclusively showed that people's gratitude stemmed not from the amount of money, but from its presentation. This explains why traditional practices, such as Vietnamese lì xì, utilize special red envelopes—the presentation is as crucial as the contents.
You can also place money inside beautiful birthday postcards or greeting cards, like the artistic handmade cards available at Chus.vn, which add a personal touch while retaining the practical benefit of a cash gift.
2. Creative ways to give money:
Research indicates that the presentation of a gift can significantly alter how people perceive it. If you do choose to give money, here are some creative ways to make it more personal:
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Use themed containers: Match the container to their interests or the occasion.
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Add a specific purpose: Examples include, "For your new guitar fund" or "Toward your vacation."
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Include cultural touches: Incorporate traditional colors or symbols to add a meaningful layer.
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Write a personal note: Explain your reasons for choosing to give money.
Better Alternatives When Money Doesn't Feel Right
Sometimes a personal gift feels more appropriate. Research supports giving personalized gifts that show you know what the person likes.
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Custom items with their name: These demonstrate you put thought into the gift.
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Experience gifts: These create lasting memories instead of just adding more "stuff."
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Handmade items: These support local artists and offer something truly unique.
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Hobby-related gifts: These show you pay attention to the recipient's interests.
Best Practices for Gifting Money
1. Do these:
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Consider their cultural background: Different cultures have varying customs around gifting money.
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Present money thoughtfully: Avoid simply handing over plain cash. Consider an envelope, a card, or a small gift box.
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Match the amount to your relationship: The amount should reflect your closeness to the recipient.
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Add personal touches: A heartfelt note or a small accompanying gift can show you care.
2. Avoid These:
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Giving plain cash without thought: This can come across as impersonal or lazy.
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Spending more than you can afford: Never put yourself in a difficult financial position to give a gift.
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Giving money to romantic partners: In many contexts, this can complicate the relationship or be misinterpreted.
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Ignoring cultural rules about money: Be mindful of customs to avoid unintentional offense.
Important Notes for Vietnamese Context
According to EBSCO Research Starters, you should understand local rules for big money gifts. In Vietnam, normal birthday amounts (under 10,000,000 VND or $400) usually don't have special requirements. But for very large amounts, it's smart to check current local guidelines.
Additional Vietnamese Guidelines:
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Money gifts are most common for children and close family members
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For workplace birthdays, contributing to a group gift fund is more appropriate than individual money gifts
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During special occasions like graduations or weddings, money gifts are often expected and appreciated
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For casual birthday parties among friends, bringing a small thoughtful gift shows better social awareness
The Bottom Line
Research consistently shows that a monetary birthday gift can be both meaningful and appropriate when given thoughtfully. Behavioral scientists highlight that gift exchange, in essence, "builds and maintains relationships" and fosters connections across diverse cultures.
The core principle is straightforward: successful gift-giving, regardless of whether it's money or another item, hinges on demonstrating care, respect, and cultural awareness. When you present money with consideration and cultural understanding, it can resonate just as deeply as any personalized present.
If you ultimately prefer a personalized gift, consider exploring Chus.vn's array of customizable options. These selections are designed to convey both cultural sensitivity and personal thoughtfulness. Whether your choice is money or a custom gift, the most crucial element remains your ability to show that you understand and value the recipient's preferences, culture, and personal values.
FAQs
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Is it rude to give money as a birthday gift?
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What numbers should I avoid when giving money in Vietnam?
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How much money should you give for a birthday gift?
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What are good alternatives to giving money as gifts?
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Should I give money to my boyfriend/girlfriend?
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Is it rude to give money as a birthday gift?
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What numbers should I avoid when giving money in Vietnam?
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How much money should you give for a birthday gift?
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What are good alternatives to giving money as gifts?
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Should I give money to my boyfriend/girlfriend?
